Just Another Sad Love Song

I haven't blurbed in a while. So here it is. lol   No poetry, nothing fancy. Just me ranting on   one topic. lol

Just Another Sad Love Song

I don't like love songs. They make me feel sad and lonely, yet I can't stay away from them. Is everyone out living this exciting, fulfilling, happy life accompanied by their soulmate who completes them in every way possible and dishes out mind-blowing sex 24/7? Am I missing out?

...AND THE SAD LOVE SONGS!

They're even more depressing. Not the actual stories they're telling, though they do get pretty rough, but the begging and crying. Someone was motivated by another human being enough to pour their hearts out and embarrass themselves for all of our benefit. I've never felt that longing for anything, well success and clothing... so does that make me superficial.

A man has yet to trump the way I feel about myself or my career or my favorite pair of shoes. I cried when I lost my burgundy guess purse and stiletto cowboy, burgundy, butterfly engraved, Nine West boots to match, (Moment Of Silence, Please. Those shoes were bad.) yet I never gave a damn about anyone of the opposite sex. A man hasn't moved me to create, write, or even play a love song on repeat and day dream in the dark. I do that for myself. lol That's my me time.

Does this stem from me never really knowing my father? I'm trying to counsel myself right now. lol My father has been incarcerated for most of my life and my mother fell a victim to project twins...

Project Twins

When a man gets two diff. women pregnant at the same time.

"Man, you hear about Rob?"

"Nah, what happened?"

"He got Denise & Sherrie pregnant at the same time."

"Ah ha! That nigga havin' 'Project Twins!'"

Courtesy of UrbanDictionary.com There's even a link where you can get the definition on a mug for $19.95 http://bit.ly/MxC9f

...and this is causing me to close myself off from guys as to not repeat the cycle. Likely, but pretty much bullshit. I haven't found a man worthy of me. I'm the shit and he should be too. Men step your game up. I'm getting bored.

A Letter to the Black Woman

This is a must hear... I've had it on repeat all morning.

It was 4am when I wrote this. And after, I realized the reason for my insomnia. I've always been a night person, but more often that not moments of uneasiness are replaying in my head. I believe I am my most vulnerable right before slumber, and thats when my words unsaid reek havoc.... How that moment should've went. What I should've said. Hence, I write a lot at night. lol

A Letter To The Black Woman

Black Woman!!!!!
What verification is required?
The touch of black lips? His warmth on your back? Protective arms?
A dreadlocked king?
The man that tainted your existence barefoot, crying, and kneeling for forgiveness?
A long lost parent’s smile of approval ? Hug of appreciation? Acknowledgement?
A Financial Security Blanket?
Acceptance from the ones who denied it?
What makes you so spiteful, full of self abhorrence, vindictive, judging, spitting putrid hate?

I love you.

More than you’ll ever know.
Black queens. Rulers of Mother Earth.
Your existence should be glorified.
Statues resurrected.
Power in your footsteps.
Brilliance in your glance.
Fingers of creativity.
Wombs of infinite blessings.

Stop it!
Diminishing yourselves.
Tolerating demons.
Justifying worthlessness.
Hating each other.
Hating ourselves.
Your venom kills.
Ripping tears of pity, sympathy, hate, and anger from me.
My heart bleeds for you.
Let me comfort & console you.
Let me love you for you.
Black woman.
Black queen.